Arms Flailing In The Air

2009-05-12T09:43:00.000-07:00

i don't love blogspot.

2009-05-07T13:54:00.000-07:00

not good at blogging

2009-03-17T22:35:00.000-07:00

saw three old friends. remembered why certain friendships fizzled. and wondering why some just drifted. missing olivia like crazy. planted my venus fly trap. working like a crazy woman. have a bit of a cold. c wiles, fifi, and i went to in n' out last night and then c wiles and i watched a grand hour of television. sometimes i wish i had a car here. or that i lived in another area other than noe valley. but soon. katie has to move to san diego so its just kelly and i to embark on a new living adventure. bought some new records and am trying to enjoy myself despite the rain.

We’re gonna do it!
Give us any chance, we’ll take it.
Give us any rule, we’ll break it.
We’re gonna make our dreams come true.
Doin’ it our way.

Nothin’s gonna turn us back now,
Straight ahead and on the track now.
We’re gonna make our dreams come true,
Doin’ it our way.

There is nothing we won’t try,
Never heard the word impossible.
This time there’s no stopping us.
We’re gonna do it.

On your mark, get set, and go now,
Got a dream and we just know now,
We’re gonna make our dream come true.
And we’ll do it our way, yes our way.
Make all our dreams come true,
And do it our way, yes our way,
Make all our dreams come true
For me and you.

Don't leave me this way part 2

2009-03-15T23:08:00.000-07:00

don't leave me this way part 1

2009-03-12T10:09:00.000-07:00

kelly and i will be moving in may.

2009-03-01T22:36:00.000-08:00

this is pretty much what life has been like lately. went home. loved my friends. got to spend a lot of time with people i really wish i could spend every single day with. broke my heart to leave them.

soooooo this weekend i went to ra ra riot almost got m u g g e d. which was awesome. hung out with richard. worked like a mad woman. and spent lots of money on a jukebox with the katie.

this week. spice world. olivia. work. olivia. OLIVIA. oooolllivivivivivia. oh and olivia.

don't stop me now

2009-02-23T13:56:00.001-08:00

i don't know what i want

2009-02-17T22:52:00.001-08:00

i think i figured out why i am terrible at blogging.
today a.st.j and i were talking about how we don't understand blogs, because in reality who really gives that much of a shit about someone elses life?

nooooo onnnneeeeeeeeeeeeee

oh but i don't think you understand how excited i am for this in two days

2009-02-02T15:57:00.001-08:00

are you having the time of your life?

2009-01-21T22:00:00.000-08:00

my pup died. i am pretty sad. there is a big hole in my heart and i feel really bad for my parents. she was honestly the best dog in the entire world. i am listening to a lot of the ataris because it reminds me of being young and not having to worry about things. its pretty bad music, but i loved it oh so much. things have been pretty dang good here. hanging out with people like charissa and kayla and my bestie richard. i hung out with an old friend chris the other night and listened to records and took a walk. i am finally beginning to feel like this is my home. i am honestly really happy. and some things are coming up regarding career stuff that could be pretty interesting. so we'll see after tomorrow how that goes. and scene.

2009-01-20T22:29:00.000-08:00

things have been swell. dear friends and new beginnings. thursday is definitely something i look forward to. that would push things over the edge of wonderful

2008-12-19T23:45:00.001-08:00

don't worry guys
i got my hair cut like brenda walsh

lately

2008-12-14T19:48:00.000-08:00

2008-12-02T22:46:00.000-08:00

only photos here now. all boring nothingnesses now report to mouth full of bees.
thats all. थाट्स अल

2008-11-24T22:53:00.000-08:00

2008-11-20T23:07:00.000-08:00

2008-10-20T00:26:00.001-07:00

i've never been so alone
and i've never been so alive

2008-10-16T23:31:00.000-07:00

2008-10-16T20:44:00.000-07:00

home was awesome. the more i think about it the more i realize how awesome it was. i am so lucky that i have olivia and brad and my family. it's hard to feel so lonely sometimes, but its nice to know that i have to selfless completely unselfish caring loving people in my life. my heart feels much less full when i am not near them.

camera phone

2008-10-03T11:21:00.000-07:00

2008-09-16T20:28:00.000-07:00

oh how i miss my dearest sweetest little larvai

2008-09-16T14:48:00.000-07:00

थिंग्स अरे चंगिंग।

things are changing. the wind is cool and getting colder.

SFSF

2008-09-09T17:15:00.000-07:00

arizona gems

2008-09-09T16:49:00.000-07:00

2008-08-05T21:08:00.000-07:00

thats pretty much what i've been up to. real pictures soon.

2008-07-19T18:45:00.000-07:00

so the roller coaster of life has taken me to san francisco.
i've been here for about two weeks now.
last weekend richard came out and we went on an adventure or two, he's coming out for i'm not sure how long on friday as well. i'm excited. i've made a nice friend named heather. she's really really into fashion and really cool. my room mates are amazing. thursday we went to the moma and saw the lee miller exhibit.

as well as frida kahlo.

which i liked a lot more than i thought i would.

i never want to get used to living here. because it's amazing.

2008-06-19T21:31:00.001-07:00

i was making a mix cd for a friend who is moving out of his old house. i was trying to put songs on it that we listened to at the house. we had a lot of good good memories at this house and we had an amazing soundtrack the entire time. so i started to actually listen to these songs instead of just reading the track names. and my heart broke. really heavily broke inside of my chest. so many memories. it's amazing how much a year can bring you. how much happiness. but i suppose i have even more to look forward to in san fran. but it's going to be different. not bad. not good. different.

life as of 5:36 pm on May 27th 2008

2008-05-27T17:32:00.000-07:00

I am a single woman on the verge of something huge. I got into a car accident today and it was the final icing on a shit show of a weekend cake. I keep positive affirmations written down on scraps of paper and tucked inside of this little leather pouch that someone who will always be really important to me bought for me in Italy.

I am buying myself tickets to Radiohead in Golden Gate park on August 22nd. Happy early birthday to me? I think so.

So I'm really lucky, we are all really lucky, to have the friends I have and to love the ones I love.

This weekend is going to be fun, Christiner and Ciarz debauchery.
July will be coming as soon as I blink and I will be a California girl once and for all.
Then the first week of August I will be in Colorado for the wedding of the century.
Then August 22nd will be Radiohead
August 30th will be friend invasion for Sarah Whitman's 21st birthday!!!

So I'm trying to also figure out what I want to do with my life, and as you all know I live for three things. Art, Fashion, and.... Guns N Roses. But I'm also a die hard environmentalist. So I was considering saying screw art I want to do environmental studies at SFSU, but then talking to my dear friend Lindsay today I was like shit, I want to do something with fashion!! I wish that I could make fashion lines more environmentally friendly for a living. That way I would win everything! Or have my own environmentally friendly fashion line, jk I can't draw.

Tell me what to do with my life!!!!!

2008-05-21T21:00:00.000-07:00

I've lost my favorite thing.
No one knows that it's my favorite thing,
but it is.
It means the world to me and I need to find it.
I've dug through my entire bedroom trying to find it and I am becoming desperate.

Things are changing a lot for me. 2 months until I move to San Francisco. I'm very excited. I need to invest in a rolling rack and some organizational items.

But I really wish it was July so my life could really start.

2008-05-01T11:26:00.000-07:00

I am stuck inside of my own head.

2008-04-19T11:00:00.000-07:00

in sad and hard times i try to remind myself that,

First of all:
I am tired.
I am true of heart!

And also:
You are tired.
You are true of heart!

oh and this is fairly important too.

http://flickr.com/photos/zachk/sets/72157604491249433/detail/

If it's not broken, break it.

2008-04-16T23:12:00.000-07:00

I sat in my backyard for 3 hours today. I made lists and wrote letters and tried to organize my brain. I really tried to break down my thoughts about SF, myself, my life, and what I want. I'm just re-evaluating things. I think every now and again everyone just needs to break things in their life down and figure out what makes them tick, what drives them, what makes them who they are. So far I haven't changed my mind about a thing, thats good, that makes me proud of the person I am right now. I haven't second guessed myself. I have so much faith in myself and my relationships. But I'm still searching. I'll let you know what I figure out.

Love you.

2008-04-14T19:55:00.001-07:00

pretty please? with sugar on top?

my nice kind boyfriend bought me this little gem. only it's gold. it's the best. i just need a better chain for it. he also bought me shark socks. i'm a lucky lady.

san fran stuff got weird today, and then got better. talked to an old friend, i'm talking kindergarden. we lived in the same neighborhood and she was definitely one of my first girl friends. we used to watch movies that were far too scary for our young minds together. well turns out she lives in san fran now. which is nuts. years later and we're going to be living in the same city again. brightened my spirits a little bit.

2008-04-13T16:26:00.001-07:00

2008-04-11T19:25:00.001-07:00

2008-03-20T10:00:00.000-07:00

Haven't had a lot to say lately.
Work is driving me crazy.
Been working on admissions.
Budgets. Craigslist. Worrying about August.
It's exciting though.
I think it's nice to know that I have to work for everything I get.
I'm glad my parents don't just give me everything, I'm really glad for that.
I feel sorry for kids my age who have had one job that they've worked at for 6 hours every week for a month. And I definitely know some.
I actually have a work ethic and am proud of the money I have, because I work really hard for it.
So when I move I will rely on my own money and not Mommy and Daddy's.
Thats all I really have to say, pictures soon I swear.

2008-03-05T20:40:00.001-08:00

please?

2008-02-19T20:20:00.001-08:00

this is my family
and there has never been better more beautiful pictures of anyone ever.

things i look at.

2008-02-10T20:15:00.000-08:00

none of these pictures, just like any of my pictures, have been photoshopped.

If You Had to Be a Celebrity Impersonator

2008-02-06T08:55:00.000-08:00

Who would you be?

http://misterlonely.gyao.jp/

Richard and I are splitting the cost of a film scanner on Friday. So lots of new things soon.

pay attention

2008-01-22T12:20:00.000-08:00

all smiles all the time

2008-01-20T21:09:00.000-08:00

creepy house that is abandoned. much less creepy during the day. equally creepy cat at house.
mrs. whiskers is my number one model.

2008-01-09T20:39:00.001-08:00

2008-01-07T09:38:00.001-08:00

livin

2007-12-27T10:18:00.000-08:00

2007 has been the most amazing year. I sat here all morning thinking about that. 2006 was a year that I completely lost track of who I was, and who I wanted to be. Then the second 2007 struck I was back, or at least I was progressing towards becoming more of myself again.

I feel more myself now than ever. In August I will be moving to the Bay Area, and really pursuing my art. Now more than ever I am determined, now more than ever I am inspired!
I have a new LCA+ from my dear Richard and I'm really excited to use it. His mother also bought me the Diana, I have lomo's everywhere!! I have to use them. I have to.

Music this year was a huge thing to me.
Paper Tiger by Beck
TV on the Radio
Bat For Lashes
Beirut
Calvin Harris
John Vanderslice
Rogue Wave
Jason Schwartzman

This year I made so many new friends too,
Becky, Ciara, Olivia. Technically I made them in 06, but I really became close to them in 07.
Late night bike rides and trips to Phoenix with Becky. California adventuring with Ciara and Olivia. Not to mention the many days just spent doing nothing and being strange. They're no drama, they're real people, they're really weird, they're really my best friends.

I went a lot of places this year, Sedona, San Diego, New York City, New Jersey, San Fransisco, Los Angeles, Fossil Creek. I jumped off of roofs into pools, and rocks into cold waters. I was more brave than I thought I could be this year, saying goodbye to bad friends and bad memories. Forgiving for things I had always said I would draw the line at. I am more forgiving than I was, I am more understanding than I was.

And I am certainly more happy than I was.

This Time Tomorrow

2007-11-07T20:27:00.000-08:00

Travis Jansen's piece "Generally Speaking," is up at the Urban Gallery at Urban Outfitters in Tempe. Go check it out. It's the first instillation in the Urban Gallery, which will promote up and coming Arizona artist work. It's a really amazing opportunity as a company to really promote the talent we have in our state. If any of you guys want to talk about getting your work in the gallery let me know!

In other news last night Patrick Swayze Jr. passed away. I am pretty devastated, and extremely lucky to have Richard around. He was our little guy and we are really going to miss him, he was the best cat ever.

Anyways,
I woke up today and my entire face was swollen from crying myself to sleep. I was an absolute wreck last night. I didn't feel much better this morning either, but we went to extreme pita and saw a lady stealing clothes out of a donation box and that made me laugh. We collected some items that were Swayze's and put them into a drawer so that we could have a funeral, or something for him. We need closure. Then we went to The Darjeeling Limited, which was nice. It was also nice to have a break from work and etc. and just hang out with Richard in the middle of the week. As sad as I am, I could not ask for a better boyfriend.

Well, at least we still have Ms. Whiskers, she's not terribly friendly, but she's ours.

We Suck Young Blood

2007-09-25T18:16:00.000-07:00

good morning herr horst

2007-08-31T11:19:00.000-07:00

First of all:
I am tired.
I am true of heart!

And also:
You are tired.
You are true of heart!

Yesterday I turned 20. I didn't feel terribly different at all. Then I talked to my father and he made me realize that the first 5 months were the worst I've ever endured in my life. I had to grow up and act like an adult more in those 5 months than in my then 19 years of existence. But I suppose that should be expected after a party when I plunged 2 floors to a rocky floor and somehow didn't break my neck. So I made it! I made it to 20! And from about... February to this very day, I've been the happiest I've ever been in my entire life. I've not only been happy, but I've been myself. I'm not the evil cynical back stabbing person I felt like with my old friends. I am not heartless. I am full of heart. I love my friends. My friends who I do not have to spend every second of my day with or automatically assume they are up to no good. My friends who I am only friends with by default of other friends that are friends with them because they are holding some horrifying secret about them. I'm not a flake. I have a tendency to be a bit spacey sometimes, but I mean well. My close friends know this.
Most of all I am very fortunate. To work where I do with the people I do. To have the boyfriend I do, who supports me so much and allows me to be strange and have the awkward quirks that I have. To have my friends that make me laugh so hard all of the time. Who are the most strange and beautiful people I've ever met in my entire life. To have the family that stands by me through the worst times.

This year I think I will work on not holding grudges. Thats something I'm fairly terrible at. If you've wronged me in the past, at this point in time I can assure you I still somewhere inside of me am still angry about it, it's just how I am. I dwell. I am unforgiving. I am working on it..

rabbit fur coat

2007-08-06T19:07:00.000-07:00

Two of Everything

2007-07-29T20:13:00.000-07:00

I have a small problem with not being able to let go of concepts.
The concept of living in a place of my own, with things of my own, instead of a condo thats not mine.
With a dog thats not mine, and everything thats just so pink.
I'm not a very pink person.

I keep making plans, and lists and plans and lists.

i guess it's because i'm a virgo

say hello to the angels

2007-07-22T17:01:00.000-07:00

midnight carwash and winkleman part II

2007-07-16T18:46:00.000-07:00

winkleman, az

2007-07-15T18:17:00.000-07:00

to me, some of the most amazing places are the ones that have been completely forgotten about by those who once loved them.

the begining of summer

2007-07-11T13:45:00.000-07:00

Family

2007-07-04T15:33:00.000-07:00